Wednesday, August 13, 2008

A Fresh, New Start

Over the last few months, my appearances on Blogger have been short, not always sweet, and very sporadic, to say the least. When I started dabbling in the Wonderful World of Blogging, this was not my intention. I vowed to create and post an article at least once a week; looking back, I did briefly accomplish this. However, general interest topics were becoming more and more elusive to me, and all this writing about myself started to seem a wee bit self-centered and--dare I say it?--narcissistic (those of you who know me, know this is one of my favorite words to use to describe many people here in my neck of the woods). It was all about me, me, me...or rather, my problems, my problems, my problems.

At one point in the not-so-distant-past, I was feeling very depressed and did not want to bring my relatively upbeat blog down into the abyss of hopelessness...so I simply chose not to write at all. I "closed up" my blog with a farewell that included expressing my hopes to rekindle some of my artistic ability and turn it into (hopefully) something that might lead me towards a real career doing what I love. That never materialized, and the people closest to me noticed. Some of their attitudes may have even bordered on pity. It was quite embarrassing.

In time, however, I realized that the only way for me to get back on track with my life was to make some drastic changes to it...some of which were not at all easy or comfortable. But the most vital alteration to my day-to-day existence was my decision to quit my job after three fairly secure, routine years. The position had become one of stress and frustration, all of which I was taking out on my family and even my friends. Something had to give, and it had to give at once.

My relationships with the people surrounding me are precious; I have taken the time to feed these relationships, care for and nurture them, and I have been rewarded with a bounty of love and trust as a result. I took the time to sow this love and trust carefully and abundantly; unfortunately, I found that I also had to take time to do some pruning. I had to weed out anyone or anything that I felt was harmful and destructive, and would cause strangulation of what I considered to be strong roots.

What I reaped has been priceless. The quantity of relationships I once had may not be there, but the quality of the ones that have remained will carry me into my old age. With my resignation, the concern over my relationships was taken care of. One down, a few more to go.

As for my art, I have something in the works that should be ready for copyright in the next two weeks. I believe in my project with my whole heart, and have taken steps to market it internationally via the world-wide web.

Two down. Are there more?

Yes, there is this one thing. I still love to write. I still love to blog. So with the advent of my return, I have decided to try to take the blog in a different sort of direction (for me, anyway). Instead of whining about family relationships, delving into world issues, and being overly-concerned with my financial future, I have decided to journal my attempt at getting back to the root (pun intended) of what I really love: nature, growth, and simplicity. I have decided, along with my husband, that the time has come to make all those "dreams" I have written about a reality. Just because I can't have my country home right this minute, doesn't mean I can't start to learn how to do everything I want to once I do live there. Although there are many things we long to acheive, one of them is trying to learn how to self-sustain. And there ain't no reason on earth I can't start practicing right here on Long Island!

This spring, I planted several Italian Essentials, as I like to call them: tomatoes, basil, parsley, oregano, grapes, and a fig tree. This is my start. This is my pre-school, or perhaps even my kinder-"garden." By the time we own that country home, we'll practically have master's degrees on everything important, like how to store vegetables and fruits for winter use, to that most crucial of subjects, Wine-Making 101 (admittedly, I doubt I can self-sustain without a nice red). Today I even started to make my own compost and joined an international home-gardening community web site.

Dang it, this time I'm determined to just do it. And I really think I will.

Many thanks to my inspiration for this post, Simply Me. Her PA garden (not to mention her pure, easy, country hospitality) makes me long to be a better person, let alone a better gardener. I want to eat and share home-grown salad every day, not just on weekend getaways!

23 comments:

Young Werther said...

Change is never easy, but once completed, you'll look back with quiet satisfaction and hindsight, that it was all for the better.

It doesn't matter what you blog, it's you! There's no rules to follow nor anyone you need appease.

Dust-bunny said...

Dear young,

I agree with you whole-heartedly. There have been many changes in my life that were frightening, but all of them led me to where I am today, and I'm OK with that! I was the victim of routine and habit, and they were getting me nowhere fast. It feels good to know that I took charge and did something about it, even if I'm only taking baby steps!

Take good care,
Lisa

Loving Annie said...

Good Thursday morning and WELCOME BACK, Dust-Bunny !!!

((HUGS DELIGHTEDLY, THRILLED TO SEE YOU :))

That is great that you quit a job that was bringing so much angst with it.

Good for you for emphasizing what really matters to you and nurturing it - your family, your genuine friendships, and your art.

You planted seeds of new life in your garden - the psychological one that feeds your soul, as well as the physical one that feeds your family.

Your decisions have been smart ones, clearly effective in the pleasure and peace they have brought with them.

Bravo again - LIFE IS SHOWING YOU THAT WHEN YOU DO WHAT WORKS FOR YOU, MUCH GOOD COMES WITH IT.

You got out of your own way, out of the 'shoulds' and the habits, and bravely, slowly, consistently, baby step by baby step followed the instincts that felt right to you inside.

The lovely picture that you put at the bottom sums it up beautifully -you are relaxing, looking forward, and seeing the beauty that there is right there in your own backyard :)

Very proud of you, and happy for you.

Genuinely,
Love,
Loving Annie

Dust-bunny said...

My Dear Loving Annie,

It is SO great to hear from you!! And, as always, it is wonderful to hear your words of encouragement.

I think I have finally taken seriously the old adage that says "you control your own destiny"--I feel very much in control right now, and although there will most surely be obstacles, I feel strong enough that they won't get me down.

I've already been asked to come back to my old job in a supposedly "better" situation, and I have refused. I'm determined this time. After all, I'm not getting any younger...if not now, when?!?

Love to you, and I hope all is going well for you!!

Take good care,
Lisa

Shimmerrings said...

This is wonderful Dust Bunny. My life has been changing, too. My significant other and I have a garden and I learned to do my first canning, ever, already, too. Plus, new job, and even new changes and growth with that. You sound wonderful, and I can hardly wait to see your new "patent"... welcome back!

Big Dave T said...

Welcome back. Always like it when one of my old blogging buddies posts after a hiatus. Well, you're not old, but you know what I mean.

I think blogging is self-indulgent by nature. It's about our individual likes, dislikes, lives, family, friends, politics, our favorite jokes, pictures, etc. It's all good.

So you're in the kindergarten phase of gardening? My wife and I tried an herb garden with many of the same plants you mentioned. Nothing survived to harvest. I think we need a Head Start gardening program.

Dust-bunny said...

Dear Shimmerings,

It's always such a joy to hear from you! I'm so glad your life is heading in a new, exciting direction...I'll have to get some advice on the canning eventually! I'm not up to that yet, but who knows what next year will bring!

Take good care,
Lisa

Dust-bunny said...

Dear Big Dave,

You always crack me up! And I realized you were right about the blogs...they really are about us and our thoughts, our lives, etc. So I went back to correct what I wrote so that it expressed what I really wanted it to say!

My herbs do well until I forget to water them...but my fig tree and my grapes are entirely more forgiving. Although there are no grapes this year, I do have a ton of figs on my tree! I'm excited to figure out what to do with them, because at this point, I have absolutely no idea. I'm not even sure I like figs!

Take good care,
Lisa

A Who said...

What's that phrase that sometimes shows up on posters? "Bloom where you're planted." Something like that? That is exactly what you are doing and I think it sounds like a great plan.

Dust-bunny said...

Dear a who,

Why did it take me so long to realize that, though? Big procrastinator that I am...

I don't WANT to wait anymore...at the risk of sounding like Veruca Salt, "I want it NOW!" I know we'll be in the country someday, but it brings me joy now to enjoy nature, growing, even the dirt. I just hope I don't kill anything!

xo,
Lisa

Betty said...

Congratulations! It sounds as if you're on a roll. Figs, by the way, are extremely nutritious, although I don't like them. Maybe you can make fig newtons!

I hope you can figure out how to make that audio work from Sept. 2005- if not, just record a new one!

Hugs,
Betty

Carine said...

how wonderful to find a post from you Lisa! And especially reading you in such great spirits. Welcome home.
Must be something in the air-My daughter and son-in-law found jobs, our son just got engaged and my husband loves his new promotion and we are able to spend time together. Plus, doing more writing than ever.

May the good times roll for all of us!

Dust-bunny said...

Dear Betty,

I feel like I'm in a good place, headed in a positive direction. It's not always easy, but I'm trying to keep my head up, no matter what!

I had always heard that figs were a good iron source, but I'm not particularly sure that's true...but they sure do taste good right off that tree!

Hope all is well with you...so good to hear from you, Betty!

Take good care,
Lisa

Dust-bunny said...

Dear Carine,

It's always fun to come back to blogger and see my "old friends"!

I have noticed that you're writing more, and I'm so proud of you...you put your mind to it, and you're doing it. I hope I can follow suit, and do the same thing over here! I'm glad everything is going so well with you!

Take good care,
Lisa

LZ Blogger said...

Like Nike says! ~ jb///

Dust-bunny said...

Dear Jerry,

Absolutely!! It's coming along fairly well...well, my figs are, anyway! I'll run photos when I write my next post, most likely this week.

Hey, love the photo of you and Mrs. LZ!! She's so pretty!

Take good care,
Lisa

simply me said...

I congratulate you on the courage it took to leave your job and pursue what we all know is your God given talents.
Thank you for saying that I inspire you. You are right there is no reason you can't begin right where you are right now. The girl who started "The Magnolia Bakery" started baking in her teensy apartment in NYC and now look at her.
Don't forget we need to make cheese and I just got the best Bread Book for my Birthday.

Kacey said...

Where have I been? I kept coming back and seeing the same old post, so I thought, "Hmm, Lisa is not ready for bloggityville, yet!" But, here you are with a couple of new posts and I am so happy to see you. I know you will do great things with your art, when the time is right. The Bible says, "Be still and know that I am God...." Ps. 46:10 Just get going with the compost heap and watch what grows. (You need lots of old vegetation, garbage and a bit of horse manure...and the patience to wait for it to turn into brown-gold)

Down Comforter said...

It's always fun to come to blogger

Chicago Carpet Cleaning said...

It's always such a joy to hear from you! I'm so glad your life is heading in a new, exciting direction...

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